New Millennium Being

TAURUS JOURNEY - INNER ANGER - THE FIRE OF MY SOUL

by Guru Rattana, Ph.D.

Issue #159, April 18, 2009

PART ONE of this newsletter explains what is happening astrologically and how the planetary interactions are influencing our personal and collective lives. PART TWO examines our relationship with our fire energy and how we can experience our inner fire as the light of our soul.

SKY EVENTS

The SUN enters TAURUS April 19 at 11:32 PM PDT (April 20 6:32 AM GMT)

The SUN enters GEMINI MAY 20 at 2:51 PM PDT (9:51 PM GMT)

APRIL 24 - The TAURUS NEW MOON is April 24 at 8:24 PM PDT (April 25 at 3:24 AM GMT)

MAY 8 - The SCORPIO FULL MOON is May 8 at 9:02 PM PDT (May 9 at 4:02 AM GMT)

APRIL 17 - VENUS went direct at 12:24 PM PDT (7:24 PM GMT) (Venus went retrograde March 6.)

MAY 6 - MERCURY goes RETROGRADE at one degree Gemini May 6 at 10:01 PM PDT.

MAY 30 - MERCURY goes DIRECT at 6:22 PM PDT May 30th.

MAY 16 - SATURN goes DIRECT at 15 degrees VIRGO at 7:07 PM PDT (Saturn went retrograde December 31, 2008.)

PLUTO is retrograde April 4 through September 10.

VENUS squares PLUTO three times - February 5, April 3 and May 2.

I. COSMIC IMPERATIVES

TAURUS NEW MOON

As usual, the planetary dynamics are influencing our reality. A look at the planetary alignments can help us understand why we are feeling the way we feel. The major overall message and impact is that we are the midst of a fundamental shift in the way we relate to ourselves, each other and the Earth.

The Sun and New Moon in Taurus remind us of our personal involvement in the transformative process. Pluto in Capricorn defines the overall context of institutional change. The Earth energies wake us up to the reality that we are in physical bodies, living in a physical world and subject to the limitations and the rules of physical reality.

The EARTH energies - Saturn in Virgo, Pluto in Capricorn and Sun in Taurus remind us that we are in the process of redefining our relationship to all aspects of the feminine - money, matter, the material world, the Earth, Nature, our bodies, sexuality and women!

The more we are in tune with our senses, our bodies, our emotions and Mother Earth, the more we can enjoy and treasure this precious life. And the more we can make realistic and appropriate decisions about how we honor life and make our contribution.

VENUS GOES DIRECT

VENUS has been retrograde since March 6. Venus went direct April 17 at 8:24 AM PST. We have had six weeks to get in touch with what we really want to do with your lives. Venus goes retrograde only once every two years. During this time we listen deeply to our heart in order to receive guidance on how we can move forward in the most satisfying and rewarding manner. It is time to break out of old ruts and do what really makes us feel valued, creative, free and happy. This can happen only if our ideals and our values line up with physical reality.

Venus squares Pluto for the third time May 2. Mars in Aries squares Pluto on April 26. Squares force action. We either take action ourselves or something happens that requires serious adjustments on our part. We are in the center of the fray. We can't sit this one out and simply watch. If you don't feel like you are at the epicenter of your own life storm, you will.

When the personal planets (Venus, Mercury, Mars) interact with the outer planets (Pluto, Neptune and Aquarius), fundamental shifts affect the whole collective. Everyone is affected. When I ask in class, who feels the impact of the current energies, everyone raises their hand. We are each being made aware of our personal responsibility and role in the current phase of global transformation. We are in the midst of a major shift in consciousness and a total overhaul of our all our social, economic and political institutions. Honesty and integrity at all levels is required.

It is up to each of us to align our passions and priorities with both our personal and collective integrity. We are required to respect the Planet and wisely use of its resources. Jupiter, Chiron and Neptune in Aquarius set the stage of optimism, innovation, creative solutions and collaboration. The Aquarian spirit is collaboration without control. Be aware of and avoid Piscean patriarchal control strategies. If you can't trust who you are collaborating with, they are not your right partners.

SCORPIO FULL MOON

The FULL MOON in SCORPIO May 8-9 obliges us to dig deep and to identify the desires, anger and fears that control our responses, actions and what and how we attract. To be happy and to live congruent lives, we must monitor and transform the base energies that sabotage our best intentions. We must learn how to use our primal energies to support, empower and comfort ourselves. This is the subject of this newsletter.

SATURN GOES DIRECT

SATURN goes DIRECT at 15 degrees VIRGO at 7:07 PM PDT May 16. Saturn has been retrograde in Virgo since December 31, 2008. For five and ½ months Saturn has applied the brakes, so that we could carefully evaluate our priorities in relationship to the relevancy of our efforts and the reality of available resources.

Taskmaster Saturn obliges us to make what seem like tough choices. But only when our roles, responsibilities, goals and action plan are aligned with our inner and outer realities and defined in the context of reasonable limits and comfortable boundaries can we move forward with success. Saturn saves us from unrealistic and ungrounded fantasies.

When Saturn (apparently) changes direction, i.e. 'stations direct or retrograde,' the slow movement of changing directions means that it remains in the same degree (or the same place) for several weeks. Saturn will be in 15 degrees Virgo from April 20 through June 11. Saturn is in 15-16 degrees Virgo from April 2 through June 28. Whatever planets you have at 15 degrees (plus or minus 3 degrees) will be heavily impacted. We will also feel Saturn's heavy hand wherever 15 degrees Virgo (plus or minus 3 degrees) falls in our birth chart. Saturn in Virgo pressurizes to line our life up with service and a healthy life style.

The intensity is magnified by the fact that between 2008 and 2010 Saturn opposes Uranus five times. Uranus upsets our apple cart. Saturn makes sure we pick up only the ripe apples and leave the rotten ones behind.

Let go of what no longer works and no longer makes you happy. Consolidate your energy and your resources. Clarify what you want and how you plan to get it. Trust your soul and the Universe. There is a special plan and a role for everyone.

MERCURY RETROGRADE

With both Venus and Saturn direct, we start to feel like we can move forward once again.

However, we get mixed messages when MERCURY goes RETROGRADE at one degree Gemini May 6 at 10:01 PM PDT (just two days before the peak of the Full Moon.) From May 13 through June 12 Mercury will be in Taurus. In Taurus, Mercury gives us an opportunity to think about our Earthly values and how we can be more in tune with our bodies, our senses, our sexuality and our natural environment.

Finances, values and priorities and making the right choices are going to be on our mind. How can new alliances support new directions? Are we listening to our intuition and our soul? We must identify the voice that is telling us OUR truth. Mercury goes direct at 6:22 PM PDT May 30th.

II. INNER ANGER - THE FIRE OF MY SOUL

In the previous NMBeing we discussed how the Aries archetype makes us aware of the fact that our biggest fight is within. When the Sun shines in comfort-loving and satisfaction-oriented Taurus, we may think that we have exited the conflict zone. However, this is not the case. The Taurus/Scorpio axis simply pushes our inner conflict deeper into our subconscious.

Every zodiac archetype finds resolution to its inherent paradox by embracing the lessons of its opposing sign. Probing Scorpio helps Taurus get in touch with its deep emotions. The Bull prefers harmony and is often at least superficially patient. However, we must be aware of what brews deep inside. If we do not take time to tune into our deep emotions, we let discontent and anger accumulate and fester. When our emotions finally reach the surface, we explode. Being aware of the Vulcan within and processing emotions as they come up helps our inner Bull avoid expressing its rage in mad tirades.

SUMMARY

In this issue (1) We will explore six 6 sources of inner anger. We will identify how we can use our fire energy to move out of these disempowering situations. (2) We will understand the gifts of fire energy and also how undeveloped and unconscious fire energy manifests in inappropriate, destructive and wasteful ways. (3) We will experience how we can use our fire energy to embody our soul. (4) We will understand how fire and earth need each other and how we can use our fire energy to empower ourselves from within. Our goal is to train ourselves to feel and enjoy the fire of our spirit in our body.

UNDERSTANDING INNER ANGER

Anger is a normal emotional response. However, the accumulation of suppressed inner anger (1) consumes our vital life force, (2) causes stress and disease, (3) poisons our relationships, and (4) deprives us of our happiness.

Inner anger is misunderstood and misdirected fire energy. We can have too much fire or too little. Either way, the basic problem is that we do not know how to use our inner fire to do what we want to do and to get what we want in life. Inner anger is also an indication that we do not know how to use our fire energy to be happy and to feel satisfied and fulfilled.

Inner anger is a sign that we are mad at something and someone outside ourselves AND that we are mad at ourselves. We are going to focus on self-directed anger.

WHY DO WE FEEL ANGRY?

Let's look at five sources of our inner anger. We are angry because we feel (1) disempowered, (2) deprived, (3) overburdened and (4) inadequate. (5) And we don't understand and accept the nature and purpose of Earth School. As you read through the following points, you will easily identify how these situations relate to you. The important thing is to check them out in your emotional body. Feel the fire energy in your body and get in touch with how you experience heat and fire in your body.

[1] Disempowered

We are angry because we feel disempowered. Our inner anger is a reflection of the fact that to some extent (1) we do not feel that we are in charge of our lives, (2) we do not have a sense of our own authority, (3) we do not have confidence in ourselves, and (4) we do not trust ourselves.

* To feel empowered we must learn how to use our fire energy to claim back our will and learn to trust ourselves.

[2] Deprivation

Perceived or unconscious deprivation is also a function of the flip side of anger - fear. We are afraid that we will not get what we want and that we don't deserve it. Feeling deprived can lead to (1) greed, (2) self-centered ruthlessness, and (3) the need to control. It can also be expressed as (4) a lack of will and (5) poor self-esteem. We don't try to get what we want because we feel undeserving.

It is a human need to feel satisfied. When we do not know how to cultivate inner satisfaction, we try to substitute external satisfaction. The fruitless quest for external satisfaction leads to attachment to things and the excessive desire for wealth.

* In the case of deprivation, we need (1) to get in touch with the unidentified hunger - the fire of desire - that drives us and (2) to bring our unconscious soul desires to the surface.

[3] Overburdened with Responsibility

The third source of our inner anger is (1) feeling overburdened with responsibility and (2) imposed upon by others and our environments. We create and allow these situations because we believe that we have to accommodate to other's needs and to respond to their demands and requests. We feel obligated to please and to make others happy.

But simultaneously, we feel imposed upon by these impossible tasks. We feel angry because we cannot do what is demanded of us. And we feel threatened because we are being pulled off our own track. We become defensive in order to protect ourselves.

We feel and respond this way because our energy is *too fluid, *too unstable and *unfocused. When our aura is porous and weak, we energetically intertwine with others and our environments. We feel responsible because we are too connected energetically. Our energetic openness makes us feel like others are imposing on us and that we are obliged to respond.

* To deal with these situations, we must learn to separate ourselves energetically by consolidating a sense of our own identity. The stronger our energy field and the more we can stay centered in ourselves, the more we can disconnect from the pull to fix and take care of others.

[4] Need to Be Perfect and Right

The fourth source of inner anger is that we believe that (1) we do not deserve what we want, (2) we feel shamed, inadequate and not good enough. The pressure to be perfect fuels our anger.

We also feel the need to be right. Our identity is threatened if we are wrong or different. Because differences in opinions and realities are a way of life, our identity is continually threatened.

* We can help ourselves with our perfection complex by setting a realistic standard to do our best. After every major decision or action, we can affirm to ourselves that we have done our best. Self-validation is an on-going process. With practice, we get better at integrating deeper levels of self-approval. We actually begin to believe in and trust ourselves!

[5] We Don't Understand or Like Earth School

Fifth, our perception of life feeds our anger. We do not understand the nature of Earth School. We are spoiled. We want and expect everything to be perfect. We have a sense of entitlement. We feel that we have a right to have what we want.

But Earth school is about learning and developing through challenges. We are angry because we don't like it down here. We are mad at God and our soul for putting us through this process called human life.

* To be happy on Planet Earth, we have to understand and accept the nature of the evolutionary game. Life situations are not bad luck, they are purposefully designed for us to grow and evolve. It is our conscious struggle that makes it possible to evolve. In the process we expand our self-confidence and develop stable roots in our own psyche that consolidate our sense of self. We evolve into a place where happiness and satisfaction are internally generated and experienced.

THE FIRE ELEMENT AND ITS GIFTS

The four primary elements each represent an aspect of our humanness. The air element represents our mind. The water element represents our emotions. The earth element corresponds to our body. The fire element represents our spirit.

The fire element is our primal energy, the force of Spirit that animates our body. Our fire energy is our light. The fire element is also associated with our intuition. Hu-man means light in the mind.

Our fire energy is our source of *vitality, *inner strength, *enthusiasm, *drive, *courage, *creativity, *self-confidence, *commitment, and *self-love. We need fire *to take action, *to persevere and *to push forward. We need fire *to be outgoing, *to be fearless, *to heal and *to love ourselves.

FROM UNCONSCIOUS TO CONSCIOUS USE OF FIRE ENERGY

Our fire is our Spirit. This brings us to the sixth source of our inner anger. Our unconscious soul desire is to be embodied - to enjoy our human experience. We are mad because we are not relating to and embodying our spirit!

This soulful anger results in a misuse of our fire energy or life force. When we do not relate to our inner fire as the life force of our soul, we are (1) constantly manipulated by this energy that is trying to express itself. (2) We are consumed by both anger and fear. (3) We burn ourselves out with unidentified anger. (4) We fruitlessly expend energy devising ways to try to feel satisfied and safe and to protect ourselves. (5) We waste and deprive ourselves of the juice of life.

To deal with our inner anger, we must use it to become conscious of our inner fire, and to develop a connection with the Spirit of our soul. Our job is to *ignite, *consolidate, *contain, and *appropriately direct the fire of our soul. These are the experiential goals that we must consciously cultivate.

FIRE NEEDS EARTH

Fire needs earth, and earth needs fire. Our spirit needs our body. And our body needs our spirit. Our spirit needs a vessel from which it can express. Our body is the container of our soul.

Fire without earth is out of control. Earth with too little fire makes us feel depressed.

The more we feel our fire in our body, the less our fire dissipates and burns out.

The more we feel the fire in our body, the more we feel alive and happy.

We want to energetically experience - MY fire is for MY body, MY healing and MY life!

THE ASCENT AND DESCENT OF FIRE

The ascent of the Kundalini takes fire up to the third eye and awakens our neutral mind and our intuition.

On the descent we embody our soul/spirit. Our soul purpose is to bring Spirit to the planet, to spiritualize matter. The descent and grounding IN OUR BODY are how we spiritualize matter.

On both the ascent and descent, fire burns out the old and ignites the new.

Feeling the fire of spirit in our body makes us happy for no reason!

HOW TO INTEGRATE OUR FIRE

We integrate and embody our fire by simply feeling the fire and the heat in our body and enjoying how it feels.

The activation and alignment of the navel center or third chakra is the key to awakening our fire power and our feeling of well-being. We ignite the fire at the navel and move it up to open our heart.

We use the air element - the breath to move fire.

We use the earth element - our body to contain our fire.

Fire fills us up with confidence and courage. Fire makes it possible to feel free to explore the unknown and to tackle life's challenges. With our embodied spirit we can thrive under the pressures of the times.

With practice we can train ourselves to feel the fire and heat in our body. Then when our anger is activated, we breath deeply and feel the heat in our body. As we experience the warmth, we can relate to it as the fire of our soul. In this way we can stop ourselves from indulging in reactive anger and victim and blame stories. We welcome the fire of our spirit into the cozy home of our body. As we embrace the fire of our soul in our body, we realize that our existence itself is the source of our happiness!

KUNDALINI YOGA AND MEDITATION TO DEAL WITH OUR FIRE

TRANSMUTING INNER ANGER TO THE FIRE OF OUR SOUL

The activation and alignment of the navel center or third chakra is the key to awakening our fire power, and feeling of well-being. All navel kriyas, exercises and meditations that include pumping the navel point and using the root lock can be used to transmute inner anger into the fire of our soul.

There are many sets and meditations to choose from - The Anger Set to repair damage to the system of ill-placed anger is on pages 56-7 of Relax and Renew. There are a whole series of navel center kriyas on pages 54-71 in Transitions to a Heart-Centered World, 2nd Edition. Sodarshan Chakra Kriya is a powerful navel pumping meditation. Breath of fire works wonders.

The important thing is to train yourself to feel the heat and fire in our body and spine and to enjoy it. After each exercise take time to feel the heat and relate to it as the fire of your soul.

INNER DIRECTIVES

The following are directives that you can use to guide your inner journey. Each one of these directives can be used as a focus for as long as it feels appropriate to you. Do not try to do too many at a time. The important thing is to consciously integrate these experiences in your body.

Use your breath to activate, move and distribute your fire.

Breathe into your anger so that it will get unstuck.

Feel how fire needs earth - your body as a container.

Feel how earth needs fire to feel alive.

Feel your body as the container for the fire of your soul.

Allow the fire to burn out the old and ignite the new. Feel the release and the new freedom.

Feel the increased radiance in your body as the liberated fire distributes through your whole body and aura.

Bring the fire up from your navel to your heart.

Feel the heat in your spine at the level of your heart.

Contain the fire of your soul in your heart. Feel your heart light expand.

As the fire rises up your spine, take it up to the third eye and awaken your intuition.

Feel the fire connection between navel and third eye.

Feel centered and consolidated.

Be aware that the more you feel your fire in your body, the less your fire dissipates and burns out. The more you feel the fire/heat in your body, the more alive you feel.

Energetically integrate your fire into your body by feeling the heat in your body.

Be conscious of embodying your soul/spirit.

With feeling invite your spirit into your body.

Feel your fire/heat radiating throughout your whole body and into your aura.

Feel satisfied and content.

Feeling the fire of spirit in my body makes me happy for no reason!

RELAXATION AND CONCLUSION

During the relaxation and before getting up and running off to your next activity, relax and feel the pleasure of fire and heat in your body.

My body is a cozy home for Spirit. Welcome home!

Attach yourself to the fire in your body and enjoy it.

Feel the fire of your soul fill you up with confidence and courage.

Know deeply that you can use your intuition and your embodied spirit to thrive and meet your life challenges.

MY fire is for MY body, MY healing and MY life!

REFERENCES AND FOOTNOTES

Austin, Stephanie, 'Taurus New Moon,' and 'Scorpio Full Moon,' The Mountain Astrologer, April/May 2009, Issue #144, pages 106-7.